Skip to main content

 
Joe-Anne Schnickenkeimskivichenzochung-SchickelGrubbeAnchovie Guest Rant
 
December 21, 2010
 
Professor Block is currently recovering from the serious hangover he thinks he is going to have on New Year’s Day.
 
Despite UB’s circumstances, he nevertheless felt obliged to provide his devoted readers (reader? Spell checker?) with some content, something to mull over, or something to reject, out-of-hand, as being too preposterous to consider.
 
Well, he knows no one reads his regular rants because they are just too boringly conventional…. not to mention his incessant Bible Thumping. So this morning UB has invited one of his old guest authors to stand in for him.
 
For readers of the, now defunct magazine of news, opinion, comics and humour, Crazy Mag, our guest author, Joe-Anne Schnickenkeimskivichenzochung-SchickelGrubbeAnchovie needs no introduction.
 
For other(s?) perhaps a little background is called for.
 
Joe-Anne Schnickenkeimskivichenzochung-SchickelGrubbeAnchovie is the latest in the line of hyphenated surname users.
 
Her Father’s name was Schnickenkeimskivichenzochung-SchickelGrubber. Her mother’s name, thankfully, was only Enkeimskivichenzochung-SchickelGrubbeAnchovie .
 
When they got married, under water, in the nude, by some radical Muslim cleric with Jewish sympathies they decided to take advantage of the similarities in their surnames to shorten things up a bit. So, instead of adopting the new surname of Schnickenkeimskivichenzochung-SchickelGrubber-Enkeimskivichenzochung-SchickelGrubbeAnchovie they merged the identical parts and came up with the truncated, Schnickenkeimskivichenzochung-SchickelGrubbeAnchovie.
 
(Which begs the question. Who has the longest name in the world?)
 
Oh well, who really cares. The only thing Joe-Anne Schnickenkeimskivichenzochung-SchickelGrubbeAnchovie is worried about right now is the apparent crush her daughter has for Adolph Blaine Charles David Earl Frederick Gerald Hubert Irvin John Kenneth Lloyd Martin Nero Oliver Paul Quincy Randolph Sherman Thomas Uncas Victor William Xerxes Yancy Wolfeschlegelsteinhausenbergerdorff, Senior.
 
Now that you are more familiar with Joe-Anne Schnickenkeimskivichenzochung-SchickelGrubbeAnchovie’s background we give you her sports report.

 
“The one team scored more points than the other team. Therefore, the first team won.”

 
Wow! That was so exciting!
 
Thank you so much for your report, Joe-Anne.. uhm…. Whatever….
 
Tune in next week to find out whether the other team won. (Rah!)
 

 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

How to Save the Ontario Basic Income Program!Background Leftist Ontario virtue signallers have been freaking out over the Ford government's cancellation of the Basic Income free money project that was cooked up by the Wynne government to build up their voter base. I follow a few of these caring individuals on Twitter to study their self delusions. They've all been afflicted lately with Ford Derangement Syndrome, peacocking their indignation at the cancellation of Wynne's free money giveaway "program." But does the program really have to be cancelled? Of course not. All it would require to be saved is for the virtue signallers, and there are loads of them, from Deb Matthews and Andrea Horwath, to a parade of obscure, Twitter addicts, and their offended fans. The good news is that the program can easily continue on a voluntary basis. The only difference is that the leftists would have to reach into their own pockets to show how committed and compassionate they …
Poor Uber Driver Oh my. This is a sad story. Here is an Uber driver voicing his concerns in the Uber driver's forum about whether or not his "sharing economy" gig is paying off. It's possible that this is not a genuine post from a genuine Uber driver. I see that. It's the kind of schlopp I would write if I were in a mischievous mood. On the other hand, given what I already know about the Uber scam, and the people it exploits in order to get them to employ "assets they already own," in Tim Hudak's famous phrase, it's entirely reasonable to believe that this is a REAL Uber driver, who is just beginning to figure out who is making money, or should be making money, and who is getting royally boned. (See my story about the Uber driver who drove a football player from Chicago to Buffalo for minus $38.50.) I knew it was a scam from the beginning. That is why, when people asked me why, instead of tolerating the City of Hamilton's demonstrably abs…
No Welfare for Immigrants:How to achieve unanimity in the Canadian Immigration debate Here's just a few, off the cuff, ideas for addressing most of the objections Canadian tax captives have about immigration. In Canada as it is set up now, only a fool can be in favour of open borders. As as libertarian, I remain 100% in favour of open borders, but only under certain conditions. The most important condition is that Canada be a free country. Since that is obviously not the case, I cannot support open borders at this time. Here are a few other conditions that, if met, would make me more agreeable to open borders, even without abolishing state education, government medical insurance, welfare, public pensions, the CBC, and so on, 1 - no welfare payments, especially child tax benefit payments, for immigrants for at least a period of time, say ten, or X, years. 2 - no free medicare for X years. (The word is that there are a lot of Pakistani MD's driving cabs. Restrictions on t…